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Friday, August 26, 2011

I Hate Dinner!

I apologize before hand—I just needed to vent!

Dinner is my nemesis—my archenemy extraordinaire! We do battle every night, sometimes I win...sometimes He wins. But lately I feel like I end up having a panic standing in front of the fridge at 5:30.

I've found a way to slay this evil super villain, Dinner, but it feels like cheating. With a gallon of milk in one hand and a box of cereal in the other I knock Him back to tomorrow. But before He goes He stares me down with beady eyes and says, "That was a cheap trick...until tomorrow."(Imagine Him with a Russian accent—I do).

Part of the problem is that the children I slay Dinner for boo and hiss if I do it properly. Vegetable chicken stir fry and Enchiladas sit on the table UNTOUCHED!

Dinner chuckles in my ear menacingly (still in Russian) at 8:00 when my 6 year old says, "I'm hungry." I raise my fist to the sky and yell, "*X%# you, Dinner!" (insert mild swearing here...I am a Mormon mom after all.)

So for now I will kill Dinner with waffles, pizza, sandwiches, cereal, and macaroni and cheese—waiting for the day I learn to prepare better, my kids taste buds develop, or I get so old I can eat cheese and crackers and no one will care.

Maybe then I can make peace with Dinner.

-Angie

17 comments:

Mel Fowler said...

Dinner can be a daunting task! I hope that you can conqure it sometime!

Angela Felsted said...

I don't know that I'll ever make peace with dinner. Wish I could hire a cook, that would definitely solve the problem.

cleemckenzie said...

My dinner issue is having to THINK of what to cook. Borrring!

Miranda Hardy said...

Very funny! I just befriended the microwave.

Angie Cothran said...

Mel - I don't hold out much hope.

Angela - Amen! I need a cook too!

Lee - Thinking what to cook is half the battle :)

Miranda - I've named my microwave...Lester.

Chantele Sedgwick said...

Oh my heck, my kids do the same thing! They are monsters when it comes to dinner! SO PICKY! I do have to wonder where they got it from though ... He he. Not that I'm picky. At all. Wait...

Abby said...

LOL! Oh the curse of being a mom and having to come up with dinner ideas - especially ones that your kids will eat. My husband always asks why I make spaghetti or meatloaf all the time and I tell him, "Cause the kids will eat it!" DUH! When I'm out on the limb we do pancakes or french toast. It's a cheat, I know!

I love the way you have written this! So awesome!

Angie Cothran said...

Chantele - I only passed my best qualities on to my kids. I don't know where the bad ones came from--probably their Dad :)

Abby - I wish my kids liked spaghetti or meatloaf. If I make it they act like I'm trying to poison them :)

Tara Tyler said...

that evil demon! i know him well!

Jenna Blake Morris said...

That sounds awful! I can't cook at all -- I've honestly burned Easy Mac to a pile of ashes in the past; turns out it's *crucial* to add water -- so I can relate.

Love the Russian accent! Very nice touch.

Ruth Josse said...

We have the same enemy! I loathe dinner. Like you, half the time it doesn't even cross my mind until someone asks me when we're eating. And of course the next question: what is it?

Angie Cothran said...

Tara - He plagues us all!

Jenna - Don't all villains speak Russian? Maybe I've been watching to much Bond.

Ruth - Loathe is the PERFECT word to describe it.

Small Town Shelly Brown said...

Amen *shakes fist*

Sometimes I think about becoming that lady who has a menu of 7 things her family will eat for dinner and then just saying, "It's Monday, it's spaghetti night." But I think I hate that lady. She's so predictable. Plus my kids change their minds daily on what they like and don't like. So what's the point of becoming Lady Redundant Woman? (catch that reference?)

Until then I will...cry at 5 pm, daily. You can set your watch to my tears.

julie fedderson said...

I always told myself that my kids would eat what I cooked for dinner and if they didn't, well tough titty, they would go to bed hungry. And now I make something for me and hubs, and have backup chicken nuggets and cheesy rice just in case they tell me curry is gross or the roast I slaved over is "spicy".

Angie Cothran said...

Shelly - I tried being Lady Redundant Woman, until my kids said, "Oh, we decided we hate tacos." So I cursed them with children...just...like...them!

Julie - I regularly feel like a short order cook.

Jillian said...

Haha -- great anti-dinner tirade! I'm actually getting better at the planning and cooking part of defeating dinner, but last month I moved into a place with no dishwasher. (Oh the horrors!) Now I'm constantly having to decide if it's worth it to make any meal that requires more than one pot or pan. I don't even have kids to please yet!

E.R. King said...

LOL! You are so not alone! I have been feeling the same way, and I usually do this time of year. I'm not a summer person as far as food goes. By the end of July I don't want to hear the word "BBQ." I can't wait for fall when I can cook my favorites: apple bread, mac n'cheese, and chicken pot pie. Bring on the cold weather!

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